Max Lance Typing

Rain Tarp Strip Tease

baseball-tarpI went to the Yankee game on Wednesday night and rain was expected.

Get there a little early, no drizzle yet, but the tarp was down and batting practice had been cancelled just in case. Around ten minutes before game time it started pouring. The good thing about sitting all the way up in the Tier Reserves is that if your seat is bad enough, then you’re covered by the overhang in the upper decks. So although I had vertigo, I had dry vertigo.

So it’s raining pretty hard but everyone had a hunch that baseball would be played. The showers were supposed to pass and the skies were clearing out West. And when the rain began subsiding, the grounds crew came out and started preparing the field.

Here’s the thing. As soon as the grounds crew appeared, everyone started cheering, and the roaring grew as they pulled the tarp off.

But what I forgot was that underneath the tarp, they have an extra layer of tarp covering the pitcher’s mound and the dirt around home plate.

So as they started taking off the giant layer of covering, everyone was clapping. But when they took it off to reveal another layer of tarp underneath, everyone in Yankee Stadium experienced the exact same disappointment that men feel when a woman takes off her bra and she’s wearing tassels underneath.

I had never been strip teased by rain tarp before, but now I know not to get my hopes up until the game’s actually played. Which it was.

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