They don't make them like they used to

There’s a lot of media attention given to the fact that Republicans are down, out of power and looking for a vocal leader. But where’s the press for another once-powerful bloc that’s now waning: evil dictators.

The last few years have been terrible for masterminds hellbent on taking over the world. And I think that it’s all been capped off by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad not being able to get away with rigging an election. This was standard fare in the good ole days, and he can’t even do it without sparking some kind of a protest.

All they’ve got is North Korea. An elderly dictator with a Napoleon complex taking two prisoners and developing a nuclear program off the Korean Peninsula. That’s the best they can do?

I’m not asking them to top their hey-day of the Cold War-era Soviet Union, but can’t you at least look like you’re trying? Bin Laden is stricken to caves and has to release his new albums through small media outlets that make it to Al Jazeera. That’s like if the Rolling Stones had to resort to distributing through an unknown Indie because no one wanted to sign them. It’s sad really.

I’m all for superheroes, good conquering evil, and democracy and the American Way, but what’s it all for if there’s no good supervillains that are willing to test it? The last few James Bond villains have been completely rooted in fiction. OK, that sounds a little weird, because that’s where Bond villains are supposed to be rooted in. But, at least earlier on they had some ties to legitimate bad guys. Now the best they can do is sell secrets or weapons to African dictators or North Koreans. Yeah, it’s evil, but not takeover the world evil.

Evil dictators out to destroy the world are relegated to their pockets of Al Qaida, Kim Jong Ils and Mahmoud Ahmadinejads and it’s pathetic. Just like how Republicans are stuck with Sarah Palin, Rush Limbaugh and New Gingrich (again). Republicans need a real Bible thumping maniac with the charm of a New Kid on the Block, just as evildoers need their next Magneto. We’re waiting.

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